Verbal And Nonverbal Dimensions Of Relationships

  1. Language is often described as a kind of “soup” in that language influences the ways in which we see the world, express ourselves, and express ideas about the world. How do our beliefs and values about language shape the experience of self-disclosure in relationships? Explain.
  2. What are some of the ways in which nonverbal communication behaviors shape your close relationships (both positively and negatively)? Give examples to illustrate and explain how these relate to research on nonverbal communication.

Full Answer Section

     
  • Directness vs. Indirectness:Some cultures value direct communication, while others favor indirectness. People from direct cultures might feel comfortable expressing themselves openly, while those from indirect cultures might use subtler cues or rely on context for self-disclosure. This can lead to misunderstandings if expectations differ.
  • Emotional Expression:Beliefs about expressing emotions can influence self-disclosure. Cultures that encourage open expression of emotions might see self-disclosure as a way to vent or seek support. Cultures that discourage open emotional expression might lead to more guarded self-disclosure, even about personal experiences.

Example:

  • A person raised in a culture that values directness and emotional expression might readily share their feelings of frustration with a friend.
  • A person raised in a culture that prioritizes indirectness and emotional control might express their frustration indirectly through passive-aggressive behavior, withholding information, or avoiding the friend altogether.

2. Nonverbal Communication: Shaping Close Relationships (Positively and Negatively)

Nonverbal communication plays a crucial role in close relationships, shaping them both positively and negatively:

Positive Impacts:

  • Warmth and Connection:Eye contact, smiling, and physical touch (hugs, pats on the back) communicate warmth, affection, and support. These nonverbal cues can strengthen bonds, build trust, and foster intimacy.
  • Active Listening:Leaning in, maintaining eye contact, and nodding can signal attentiveness and interest in a partner's communication. This active listening fosters a safe space for self-disclosure and strengthens the relationship.
  • Mirroring and Matching:Subtly mimicking a partner's body language or facial expressions (mirroring) can create a sense of rapport and connection. Matching a partner's energy level (e.g., being calm if they are calm) can also contribute to a positive interaction.

Negative Impacts:

  • Crossed Arms and Frowning:Crossed arms, furrowed brows, and averted eye contact can signal boredom, disapproval, or anger. These nonverbal cues can create emotional distance, make the partner feel unheard, and damage the relationship.
  • Restlessness and Fidgeting:Restlessness, fidgeting, or looking at one's watch can communicate disinterest or impatience. This can be hurtful to the partner and hinder effective communication.
  • Sarcastic Tone:Nonverbal cues like tone of voice can contradict spoken words. A sarcastic tone can undermine trust and create conflict, even if the spoken words seem neutral.

Research and Examples:

Research by Mehrabian (1971) suggests that nonverbal communication (facial expressions, tone of voice) can account for a larger percentage of message interpretation (over 90%) compared to the actual words spoken (less than 10%). This highlights the significant impact of nonverbal cues on our close relationships.

Example:

A couple is discussing a disagreement. One partner maintains eye contact, speaks calmly, and leans in slightly, demonstrating active listening. The other partner avoids eye contact, crosses their arms, and sighs repeatedly. The first partner's nonverbal cues indicate openness to communication, while the second partner's nonverbal cues suggest defensiveness and a lack of interest in resolving the issue.

By understanding how our beliefs about language and nonverbal communication behaviors influence relationships, we can become more mindful communicators and foster stronger connections with others.

 

Sample Answer

   

The way we view language ("soup") significantly influences self-disclosure in relationships. Our beliefs and values about language shape how comfortable we are revealing personal information and how we interpret disclosures from others.

Here's how:

  • Individualism vs. Collectivism: Cultures with individualistic values might emphasize self-expression and openness, leading to more frequent and direct self-disclosure. Collectivistic cultures might prioritize group harmony and social order, leading to more guarded self-disclosure and a focus on maintaining positive relationships.