Dictionary’s definition or a societal understanding of the word:

Extend the definition of one of the following words beyond either the dictionary’s definition or a societal understanding of the word:

Family
or
Success

In the introduction of your draft, briefly explain how the dictionary or society defines the word you've selected, and then explain the extended definition of the word in a single-sentence thesis towards the end that outlines the main points of extension. In the body paragraphs, provide unique examples and explanations to support these points of the extended definition. Your thesis must inform your readers of the extended definition and, because you are writing in the informative mode, you must use objective language. For this essay, writing in the informative mode means avoiding writing in the first-person and/or framing personal examples using objective language.

Using the color codes provided, evaluate your draft as follows:

Use red text to indicate your thesis statement.
Use green text to indicate the topic sentence of each body paragraph.

Answer these questions in essay:

  1. What is the significance of your essay? Why should readers care about what you have written? (2-3 sentences)
  2. Which areas of your draft do you think will benefit most from revision? (2-3 sentences)
  3. Consider the strengths and weaknesses of your writing. How can you capitalize on your strengths and improve on your weaknesses in future essays? (3-4 sentences)

Full Answer Section

     

Extended Definition:

I propose an extended definition of family that is more inclusive and reflective of the diversity of family structures in today's world. My extended definition of family is:

Family is a group of people who are connected by love, support, and commitment.

This definition includes biological families, adopted families, foster families, blended families, extended families, and even chosen families. It also recognizes that family can be more than just blood relatives. Family can be the people who love us unconditionally, support us through thick and thin, and are committed to our well-being.

Examples and Explanations:

  • Chosen families: Many people have chosen families, which are groups of people who they consider to be their family, even though they are not related by blood. Chosen families can be friends, roommates, mentors, or anyone else who plays an important role in our lives.
  • Foster families: Foster families provide temporary homes for children who cannot live with their biological families. Foster families play an important role in supporting children and helping them to thrive.
  • Blended families: Blended families are families that are created when two people with children from previous relationships get married or remarried. Blended families can be complex and challenging, but they can also be very loving and supportive.
  • Extended families: Extended families include grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and other relatives. Extended families can provide a strong support system for their members.

Significance of the Essay:

This essay is significant because it challenges the traditional definition of family and proposes a more inclusive definition. It is important to recognize that there are many different types of families, and that all families are valid. This essay also highlights the importance of love, support, and commitment in defining what it means to be a family.

Areas for Revision:

One area of this essay that could benefit from revision is the introduction. The introduction could be expanded to provide more background information on the different types of families and the challenges that some families face. The introduction could also be used to more clearly state the thesis statement.

Another area of this essay that could benefit from revision is the body paragraphs. The body paragraphs could be expanded to provide more examples of the different types of families and the ways in which they support their members. The body paragraphs could also be used to explore the challenges that some families face and how they overcome those challenges.

Strengths and Weaknesses:

One of the strengths of this essay is that it is well-organized and easy to follow. The essay also uses clear and concise language. Another strength of this essay is that it is informative and provides readers with new information about the different types of families.

One of the weaknesses of this essay is that it is not very personal. The essay does not include any first-person anecdotes or stories about the author's own family. This could make the essay less engaging for some readers.

Conclusion:

This essay proposes an extended definition of family that is more inclusive and reflective of the diversity of family structures in today's world. The essay argues that family is defined by love, support, and commitment, rather than by blood relations. The essay is significant because it challenges the traditional definition of family and highlights the importance of love, support, and commitment in defining what it means to be a family.

Thesis Statement:

Family is a group of people who are connected by love, support, and commitment.

Sample Answer

   

Extended Definition of Family

Dictionary Definition:

  • Family (noun): A group of people who are related to each other, especially a group of parents and their children.

Societal Understanding:

Society typically defines family as a traditional nuclear family, consisting of a married couple and their biological children. However, there are many different types of families, including single-parent families, blended families, and extended families.